You can’t, until you can.
I have found myself saying this so often lately, mostly at CrossFit.
How many times I have heard people say, “I can’t do that,” yet, they have not ever tried. I tell them to try it, and boom! They do it.
No, I’m not implying everything and every time will be like this. What I am saying is that the difference for them of doing and not doing something is the choice, the thought to do it.
Leading up to such moments, the thoughts in their head were to the tune of, “I can’t do that. I don’t know how to do that. I will never be able to do that. She’s strong, that’s why she can do that, but I’m not that strong.” These are all self defeating thoughts. And they are disempowering. So, as per the famous Henry Ford quote, “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
You can go your whole life thinking you cannot do a pull up, or a ring dip, or a handstand walk, and you are right you can’t. Because with that mindset you have already lost. You have lost out on the experience of trying; lost out on the experience to feel into it and see where you need corrections, focus, strengthening; lost out on the fun of working towards something you feel calling to you, even if you don’t get it; lost out on the amazing sense of accomplishment you can have if you do get it.
What does this negative self talk provide you? What are you gaining from holding yourself back? You are gaining something from it, or else you wouldn’t be doing it. This goes for everything in life.
What is possible for you if you were to shift your thinking to choose to do something you feel calling you? What if, instead of saying you can’t, you said, “I want to do _____ because ____,” and tie it to your why? Your reason for wanting to do it. Because: it is fun; I am strong; I am getting stronger/more coordinated every day; I will feel amazing and fulfilled; I love pushing myself to see what is possible.
We all have our own why’s. Choose to do something because you feel it is you calling you to experience more of yourself. There is a resonance there calling you, magnetizing you, yet, you have the free will to shut that natural part of you off by saying, “I can’t do that.”
A baby can’t walk, until she can. A child can’t read until she can. A teenager can’t drive a car, until she can. I couldn’t do a pull up, until I could. I couldn’t do a handstand walk, until I could. You can’t start your own business, until you can.
You get the point. It is literally a moment to moment difference of doing and not doing.
Some things are easier to do than others. Some things may feel more natural to you than others. But, they ALL start with a choice. With a thought.
Your destiny is not your now reality (it can be, though, if you choose to believe it), so, don’t allow that to fool you into thinking where you are now in life is all you can be. Your destiny is your potential, provided you nurture, nourish and fuel it (meaning your thoughts, your choices, your mindset).
What you think about, you bring about.
Where your attention goes, energy flows.
You are the only one stopping you from experiencing what you desire. Make a decision. Choose choices leading you in the direction of your intended outcome.
What mental house are you building and living in?
– Coach Deana Pena
Coach Deana is training to become a certified Life Coach. She can be reached at Deana@aprojectsc.com